Jeris Johnson – Dragonborn Review

By Dear Hollow

If you don’t know Jeris Johnson, let that horrendously edited self-portrait that would feel like a masterpiece of character design on Nintendo 64, like Lara Croft’s pyramid boobs, really sink in. For the uninitiated, he’s that guy who partnered with Papa Roach for a “reloaded” version of “Last Resort;” he did a collaboration with Bring Me the Horizon for a remix of “Can You Feel My Heart.” For the initiated, he is big on YouTube and TikTok. For his first full-length Dragonborn, you might be confused about what exactly this album sounds like. I’ve repeatedly spun it, and I remain confused.

What Dragonborn does is drags pop versions of metal, rock, electronic, and hip-hop kicking and screaming into an album entirely devoted to TikTok trends like the “Hoist the Colors” bass vocal covers, Ronnie Radke’s antics, sea shanties, and melodies ripped from classic songs. Jeris Johnson helms the craft with a very confused charisma, a grungy smoky tenor that tries to adapt to the clusterfuck of influences, forcing a square peg of Viking and fantasy imagery through the round holes of trap music, nu-metal, and hard rock. Insufferably bland at best and unbearably awful at worst, influences slamming across the universe with Falling in Reverse-esque abandon. Dragonborn is as bad as you can imagine, and often worse.

Let’s start with the good mediocre passable tolerable. “John” is a dad-rock anthem with a decently written chorus that worms its way into your brain whether you like it or not – conjuring the likes of Nickelback or Staind. Jeris’ cover of Seal’s “Kiss from a Rose,” while utterly unnecessary and only adding a weaker vocal performance to song’s legacy, is as okay as a pop/rock song you hear on the radio in the mid-2000s. Otherwise, Dragonborn’s strengths shine as brief glimmers of potential in isolated passages: the Korpiklaani-inspired plucking in the intro title track isn’t bad; the riffs of “When the Darkness Comes,” “Down with the Dynasty,” and “Not a Person (Freak)” have some weight at first. Johnson’s voice is also capable and has potential, even if he can’t seem to write a solid verse, chorus, or bridge to save his life.1 So, uh, we’re in fucking trouble.

Perhaps the biggest and dumbest thing about Jeris Johnson is his ability to make an audio train wreck impossible to look away from. Interpolations are perhaps most jarring. “When the Darkness Comes” features a central melody stolen from the Arabian riff (aka “Streets of Cairo”) in an “I guess the minor key works if you’re into that” way, the central melody of “Siren Song” is unashamedly robbed from the fucking Christmas goddamn classic hymn “What Child is This?” for fuck sake and I never thought I would be checking that off of my 2024 bingo card. Meanwhile, “Story of Our Lives” tries to force electronic, trap, rap, and Tyr-esque medieval melodies into an orgy with no chemistry; “Welcome to Valhalla” feels like you wanted “Hoist the Colors” to be both a Wardruna cut and a trap metal song by Travis Scott; “Here’s to the Years” features an Alestorm-meets-Dropkick Murphys pirate vibe plus Irish shanty jig that makes me wanna puke; “Down with the Dynasty” is basically a metal cover of “Centuries” by Fall Out Boy without any fun or catchiness; “Not a Person (Freak)” features a We Butter the Bread with Butter-inspired shuddering deathcore breakdown that is only iterated fucking once; “Eat Drink War Repeat” is basically a Brokencyde song with all the soul-crushing cringe and likewise not knowing what sex is; “Ode to Metal” is just a rap/punk song that Ronnie Radke would start beef with someone over; and “Finish Line” is basically a Five Finger Death Punch power ballad. The independent nature of Dragonborn is also plain bad, as Jeris Johnson’s autotuned gaffs shine through “Story of Our Lives” and “When the Darkness Comes” with piercing clarity.

So what’s left? A singer/songwriter who has no idea what kind of album he actually wants. Is he a Viking king? A club-frequenting playboy? A hair-flipping fan of Falling in Reverse? Someone who would actually defend Ronnie Radke on Instagram? Someone who’s likes Shrezzers’ “PVRNHVB”? I’ll tell you who Jeris Johnson is: he’s an influencer on YouTube and TikTok. And Dragonborn is an experiment of the most embarrassing variety, but ultimately is not intended for us. I mean, if you’re into unnecessary variety and TikTok trends, have at it. I need to sit down.

Rating: 0.5/5.0
DR: N/A | Format Reviewed: STREAM
Label: Self-Released
Websites: jerisjohnson.com | facebook.com/killjerisjohnson | tiktok.com/@jerisjohnson
Releases Worldwide: August 23rd, 2024

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